i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
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