We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Dear god my vagina.
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