Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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