This girl is more easily done than said...
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
