This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
