yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize