I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
