Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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