I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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