My first STD was from a foam party
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
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