i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
