That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
