He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
That was before I lit my hair on fire
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
