Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
