Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
