i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
you never un-have a 4some
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
