theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
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