I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
