We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
