She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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