I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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