I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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