Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
