Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
