The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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