Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
