I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
