so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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