I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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