...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
