It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
God gave him joint rollers for hands
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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