i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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