i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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