He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Randomize
