are you so shy because you have an std?
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
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