omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
