have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize