Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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