but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Naked Twister starts at high noon
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
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