He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
