Can i not drive my cunt home
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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