WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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