So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Just puked most of my soul out..
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize