Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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