my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
