If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
