Dual....:-)
Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
We have started to decorate penises.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
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