should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I believe in your delicious
Your shirt... Was in my pants
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
