And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
You're completely useless in the revolution.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize
