The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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