I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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