they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
